Through the large timespan from 1,000BC to 449 AD (Greek/Roman era), there is a sign of transformation. Every artist has their own unique style to the artwork that they are creating. A group of people can get together to paint the same thing, but the outcome of their paintings will all be different. This theory explains how the form of art in 1,000BC differs from the art in 449 AD. Both may carry the same message across, but the style has changed. Art has always been a symbol of expressing feelings, ideals, politics, and many other things. In the Greek and Roman era, art was used to express human anatomy. At the time, people started to realize that the human body was holy. There was a realization that human beings have a purpose to be living on this planet. Many pieces of art from this time show the curvature and the detailed features of the human body. Religion also played a big role in the art of the Greek and Roman era. Many people of the time painting pictures that showed the heavens or god like figures that people respected. These paintings represented the beliefs of the people in the time period, and who they respected. Artists of the time took what was written with words, and formed it into pieces of artwork that impacted people of the time and people today. Artwork of any time holds power to at least one person in the world. Each painting, sculpture, song, poem, and many other forms of art can allow the people of the time and in the future to form their views on religion, science, and aesthetics of society.
Nancy Lai, Janelle Li, Zachary Lindecamp, Kelsey Nakamura
This answer is very well written, but it seems to be full of the "fluff". There needs to be more raw evidences and examples from the research. For example, you wrote, “Many people of the time painting pictures that showed the heavens or god like figures that people respected.” Anyone can write this just from taking world history, what needs to be given is a specific example of someone rather than people, or a painting rather than most paintings. This brings me to my next point; the question was not properly addressed. The prompt asked for you to choose a piece of art, and you just talked about art in general. Even if you were supposed to talk about art in general, it would take much more information and more examples to fully address the subject with so many different types of art and such a vast time period. In addition, in sentence 5 you stated that 1000BC art had similarities but style was different from 449AD. That sentence leads readers into thinking that you are going to compare and contrast art from the two time periods, yet that never happens. It seems like that sentence was just put in there to get a certain word count or something. Also, what time period are you talking of for the rest of the answer? 1000BC or 449AD? It can’t be both considering you stated they differed. So basically all you need to work on is: try to use more evidence from the research, to only write sentences that are necessary, and read the prompt carefully so it is addressed correctly.
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